Wedding Information

Archive for the ‘Wedding to do list’ Category

I have been to 1 wedding im my life, i have no idea what kinds of things I need to do, and I have no exact budget, except as cheap as possible! i decided on the colors (peridot, holly and white). and i have the pary pretty much picked out, i am going to rent out the hibernian hall in Albany for that date..my uncle has conections so it shouldnt be a problem. i want to use a JOP. but i have no idea what else to plan, where to go to buy stuff, we are going to cater ourselves, imma hire a few people from the hall to serve! clearly ill want a dj not a band to keep it cheap. i have to look into flowers and cost of dresses (but i cant get my dress for a while bc i plan to loose a lot of weight first!!) i have to look into flowers. what else do i need to buy or look into. i need a very detailed list of what to do/ buy etc….. PLEASE!!! (ps wedding is in august 09, about 200 people! hopefully less!!! )
how much do caterers cost just in case…….

and how much do dj’s typically cost???

Congrats

1. Here’s the budget file I use… change the fields accordingly but first look at everything: http://www.vertex42.com/Links/go.php?url=file-weddingbudget

2. Get a Wedding planner book or just use online ones. Better yet go to a wedding show and they usually give it for free.

All details are in the book or online: http://www.blissweddings.com/wedding_planner/planners.asp

Another thing, just post ads on your local website’s craigslist for florists, photography etc and see who gives you good deals and use those prices as negotiation tool later on.

All the best

What do I need to have a complete wedding? List..steps..ect

food, obviously music, cake, dancing . ( or if you dont want it to be like a party then just go with the flow and how youl feel like it to be)

OK so I want to firstly make it completely clear that I would never ever expect any presents whatsoever and I was always unsure about wedding lists. But people have mentioned its a good idea to prevent friends wasting money on duplicate presents.

I have no intention of putting a wedding list in the invites or anything I just thought perhaps I should have one incase people ask. Now a lot of people I know arent into using the internet so I was wondering if you can get a paper/book style wedding gift list? I cant find one but I do remember years ago someone having one that was almost like a cheque book (you tear out the one you wish to buy for the couple). Has anyone seen these anywhere?

Ideally we would prefer cash or gift cards I think most couples would- I even love the idea where people contribute to your honeymoon but I think most guests dont want us to know how much they have spent which I completely understand.

So my question is… do these book style gift lists even exist? Any paper versions? I dont want to force people to use one shop or to use the internet…

Thank you

I know about argos gift lists etc but I don’t want to tie people to using certain shops or anythin like that

I’m not sure about the book lists you’re talking about, but the thing about registries is that, even if people aren’t "into the internet", as long as you register at a couple of places that are easy to get to, like Target, Kohl’s, Macy’s, etc, they don’t need the internet. They can go into the store and have instant access to what is on your list there that hasn’t been taken.

And the issue of where you’re registered isn’t that big a deal. In the old days, word of mouth worked perfectly - people will be asking you, your mom, your bridesmaids. Also, if someone gives you a bridal shower, your registry info is usually listed on the invite.

You’ll get your share of cash regardless, but I do think it’s important to give guests the option of a present. A lot of people still prefer this.

Ok here is what is going on i am getting married next month and certain family members keep calling saying they have people to add to the guest list. Let me explain my fiance family keep calling
saying they have other family members to add to list mind you this are people who were not invited in the first place. His grandmothers nephew and his great cousin’s were not invited yes his great aunt and uncle were invited but not there kids. My great aunts and uncle on my side were not invited as i don’t really know them and just wanted close family and friends to attend. I mean this is a month before the wedding and we have like 10 people who are coming that was not invited. His family says well they were planning on coming to Visit that weekend and no idea the wedding was that day so we just invited them. Ok fine maybe on or two but not ten we are already way over the limit as to how many people we wanted. But then i get yelled out for inviting a close friend who i just started to talk to again. How do i nicely tell them they can’t invite anyone else i mean i have a month till the wedding and we keep having to add people when i called the tent company in the begging i just got enough table and chairs for people who were invited knowing that not all will show. Please help this is stressing me out it starting to feel like a family runuion for his family instead of a wedding.

Say that you and your husband to be created a guest list based on what you could afford and were comfortable with and you have reached the maximum number of guests you can invite. Say unless someone gets an invite directly, they are not invited. You might have to tell some of these people directly to ensure the word gets around. It’s nice to accommodate a person here or there but I agree it can get out of hand quickly. Best to nip it in the bud sooner than later.

I am currently being faced with 2 wedding guest list issues. Both dealing with cousins and both dealing with children.

I come from a large family (9 aunts and uncles between both parents) Therefore I also have a large number of cousins. Some of these cousins are old enough to have children my age (mid-twenties)

Fact: I plan on inviting ONLY up to first cousins. (No 2nd, or 3rd, and so on)
Fact: Children under 11 are not being invited to the wedding or reception. With the exception of my nephew who is my ring bearer and is the ONLY niece or nephew)

Issue one: I have a set of 3 second cousins who are my age on my fathers side. I am not close to these kids as we grew up apart, but I am close to their mother my 1st cousin. I intend on ONLY inviting my first cousin and her husband. My 2 of my second cousins think that this is unfair and that they should be included because we are close in age. They also feel that they should drag along the 5 children they have between the two of them all under the age of 4. They weren’t supposed to be told that they weren’t invited, but my aunt (Their gram) let something slip when she was up visiting. Neither my cousin or my aunt will be the least bit hurt by me not inviting their children.
How do I clear up this problem without any more drama?

Issue Two: I have an adult cousin on my mothers side with a 4 year old adopted daughter from Guatemala. Unfortunately my cousin only has partial custody of this little girl due to a divorce. Because of that we only see her a couple of times a year, and usually in the fall. My aunt is up in arms over this little girl not being invited to the wedding because “It would be a good time for her to see family” and “You really should use her has a flower girl anyways”. I have made it clear that I am not having young children at my wedding or reception. Also this girl is a tiny tyrant who has clearly been spoiled as a result of her parents. I would worry about her making a scene, and as a flower girl I wouldn’t trust her since in the past she has been quite mean to my nephew because she didn’t like him.
How do I address this issue as well?

I apologize for the length, but I am being bombarded by emails, voicemail, and FB messages and the wedding is STILL a year a way!

Okay, YOUR choice to invite certain generations…Your grandparents generation, your parent’s generation, and Your generation which includes your siblings AND first cousins…

You do NOT have to invite the second generations of cousins as long as you make the cut off first cousins-age is NOT a factor.

To explain this you say you can only afford to invite up to the first cousins…you can not afford 2nd, third cousins…there is no money for that…there is no room for that.

Second, you have the right to make a cut off based on age as well……she does not qualify because she is too young and not a first cousin-her mother is. So by both ‘rules’ she is can not be invited.

The only exception to the no child rule is 1) siblings of the bride or groom 2) child members of the bridal party.

You answer each enquiry once….any repeat enquiries you may answer with ‘I am still very sorry, but my first answer to your request stands…please let us know if you and S0 and So will be attending….

My fiance are were going over our guest list and already are up to 150-160 people. I only want to have about 100 guest, as we are on a limited budget. He wants to invite all his aunts, uncles and cousins…..he has 50 cousins! Both his parents have seven brothers and sisters…I don’t mind having all his aunts and uncles on both sides, but I think it is a bit ridiculous to invite ALL the cousins, I haven’t met half of them either! He doesn’t want to exclude anyone, but we have to draw the line somewhere. No matter what we do, someone is always going to be offended, and I don’t particularly care, it is our wedding and we are paying for it.

Lol, I am almost the exact same situation with my wedding guest list!! My fiance’s barely knows some of, and rarley sees, his father’s family so we were only going to invite the ones that turned up to his brother’s wedding but then we thought it would be rude not to ask more so we extended it a fair bit, more than I wanted. See, my fiance’s father has more family on his side than his mum’s side and both my parents sides. We are paying $100 per person so we can’t have everyone. Most of that family are his cousins, not many aunties and uncles and some second cousins so I said we can invite his cousins but draw the line at their kids. I know some will be offended but I agree with you, we have to pay for it and I don’t care either if they care. So talk to your fiance and find somewhere to draw the line, like only invite the cousins who he knows the best and no kids or something. I know what you mean but at the end of the day, it’s your wedding and you pay to pay for it. Do what is right for you and your pocket!

As in, around twenty people (including/excluding the bridal party)? Of course, having all the trimmings of a 150-person guest list (music, dancing, catering, etc.)

Not that there’s a financial bound of families too big, but just out of personal choice. What’s your opinion?

We did that. We actually had fewer guests. We actually were trying to save money, and we found a way to incorporate, well, MOST of "the trimmings" in modified ways.

For example, we used antique platinum-rimmed china and served steak, but we barbecued the steak ourselves. And instead of a DJ, we burned CDs of the music we wanted. Actually, the weather turned chilly so we moved our party inside and no one actually ever ended up dancing even though we’d prepared for it.

I think you should do whatever the two of you are most comfortable with.

What all is there to plan? Like I know invviations, food, dance hall, church, dress, bridesmaids dresses, groom stuff, I am planning mine for next year and would love some help!!!!
Any tips or ideas… websites with to do lists I could use…would be sooo so appriciated!

I like The Knot (theknot.com). It has tons of information and ideas, and probably more than one checklist. You have to sign up and create an account, but it’s free. Check it out!

My fiance and I have been planning our wedding for some time now and my future mother in law says I need to mail out engagement announcements. I have a book and it doesn’t mention mailing out anything. All it says is that we should personally let our family members know and then announce it in the paper. I am planning our wedding announcement for the paper and we have already alerted our relatives but, she still says I need to mail out announcements so people can plan on the date. She said doing this can also "test drive" the addresses I have for everyone. If this is the case, I guess I need to finalize the wedding list sooner. (AHHH!) She thinks the book I have is out of date but, I don’t think it is. Maybe I’m wrong though.
Do I have to send out engagement announcements? If so, can I just send out save the date cards? I really don’t want to go about this the wrong way but, the whole thing seems silly to me.

That does sound kind of silly. I got engaged in October and our wedding is this coming November. We originally wanted to do an announcement in the paper, but decided instead to register our own website and do an announcement there. We sent out save-the-dates to our attendees, which had the website on them. It’s a much more personal touch, and has the whole story of how we got engaged, and photos and everything. I think you should just tell your close family and friends in person. Plus, if you do a website, you can later add wedding and travel information on there, not to mention that doing an ad in the paper that will run on one day only, probably without a photo, will cost more than registering and hosting a site for a whole year. Check out www.lunarpages.com.

My fiancee and I decided not to have a wedding list as we don’t need anything else apart from the big things - and we can hardly ask for a sofa can we? So we thought money would be more pratical. Only that people in Britain are a bit funny about that sometimes Is the following phrase ok or is it to straight forward? Wasn’t sure if the word "contributions" only relates to money…??On the other hand we don’t mind receiving more personal gifts if somebody is short of money or a secon hand sofa - but I don’t want to write an essay and it won’t apply to most of them..so what do you think?

Please do not feel obliged to buy a gift! Your presence at our wedding is more important to us. However, if you wish, contributions towards the bigger things for our new home would be greatly appreciated.

The etiquette way would be NOT to say anything in the wedding invitation envelope. You don’t want to call attention to gifts, money or pitching in for a gift. However, we all know it’s been done many times.
If you choose to include something, I would have a little card printed up that is sent in with your invitations & enclosure. The 1st two sentences you noted above is perfect. I think it would be best to take the last sentence off entirely…because it’s basically stating that you will take money. It’s contradicting what you said in the 1st two sentences.

You could change the copy to say "Monetary Gifts Only Please." This would clearly tell guests that you will take money towards a bigger item.
Good luck & Happy Planning!
Rexcraft